Friday, December 28, 2007
2007 Can Kiss Our Asses
There's no denying it - 2007 flat out blew. It blew goats. It blew more than a hooker dressed as Monica Lewinsky at a Bill Clinton impersonators convention. It blew so bad that three idiots who have scattered to different parts of the country banded together to give you a dopey analysis of the world of sports, and a few people actually paid attention. If this blog isn't an example of how bad things have become, I don't know what proof you need - we're fucking morons people.
Don't believe us that 2007 was awful? Let's look at the proof:
* There was the infamous NCAA Tournament Snub of Syracuse in March.
* Syracuse fans were lucky this year though, the snub was followed by the lacrosse team that had its first losing season in more than 30 years.
* Hey, at least there was football. 2007 was supposed to be the year they turned everything around and if by "turned around" you mean death spiral, then mission accomplished. In fact, we were lucky enough to witness one worst football seasons in school history, culminating in 10 losses (most of them ugly) for only the second time in more than 100 years of playing the sport, and for that, the coach got to keep his job.
* Late fall of 2007 brought us renewed hope in the form of basketball. Except for one thing, Syracuse guards obviously aren't working through their "My Name is Earl" karma lists, because ACLs were ripping like acid washed jeans in the 80s - first Rautins went down in August, then Devo followed. Now, the season is up in the air and a walk on is the back up point guard.
* The idiots are more well rounded than just Syracuse, I happen to be Philadelphia Eagle fan and the year started with the Saints pounding them out of the playoffs and will end with the 2007 version not even making the post season. I'm not sure who had a worse year, Andy Reid or his sons. It was a year the Eagles pissed away - fumbled punts, late drives and missed field goals turned a potential 11 win season into 7 wins to date - and it was all their own fault. Hey, at least Andy can still make cool faces:
* Boss is a huge Pittsburgh Steeler fan and things were rolling along just fine for that team, until Willie Parker broke his leg. They are now relying on this guy to really carry the load the rest of the way.
* Champ is a Raider fan - and honestly, until the old guy in the white jump suit retires, the expectations of that franchise are lower than the collective IQ of the owners of bad newz kennels. On a side note, can you believe Bill Callahan coached this team in a Super Bowl in 2003???? 2003 wasn't that long ago - weird.
* Florida is the national champ in football AND basketball - I don't have anything against the gators, but for the love of God man, enough is enough. The basketball coach looks like Eddie Munster and waffles like a politician and the football coach is named Urban. Does anyone else find this strange? (for the record - both are great coaches).
* In baseball news, mites (or whatever the hell they are called) did what man could not do, they derailed Joba Chamberlain.
* And then Red Sox won the World series again - what a nightmare. On the plus side, at least the rest of the world is now realizing their fans are just as bad as us Yankee fans, so they've got them going for us, which is nice.
* Guys like Ron Mexico, everyone named in the Mitchell Report, Barry Bonds and sadly, news today about Jim Leyritz all brought some form of misery to fans or other people.
* And going back to Syracuse to round out this list, they STILL CAN'T GET THE UNIFORMS RIGHT for any sport. This seemingly simple task is one that continues to dangle out of reach.
Fear not readers of T3I, while we have bravely endured all these hardships, and many others we haven't even mentioned, we really enjoy doing this and don't plan on stopping any time soon. Thanks for stopping by and remember, 2008 has to be better - if it's not, you can bet your ass we will tell you about it.