After much delay, we are back with Part II of the exclusive "If Broads Were Baseball Teams" series you can find only at T3I. To read Part I and the genesis of this dumb series we will probably never finish, click here. Today we tackle the AL Central.
The Chicago White Sox
The White Sox are the less popular of two sisters, who while she has had a good degree of success, has also experienced great shame. She's had more success lately than her more beloved sister, but no matter what she does, she'll never be as popular. As a result, she's extremely needy, she acts out to seek attention and is known for profane outbursts.
If the White Sox were a broad, they would be Ashley Simpson.
The Minnesota Twins
The Twins are the quirky, lovable independent actress that everyone loved in the 1980s. Not attractive in a super model sort of way, she still had achieved success that she'll never quite recapture. It's still cool to like her, but people don't pay much attention and she's never winning an Oscar.
If the Twins were a broad, they would be Ally Sheedy
The Detroit Tigers
The Tigers are the girl that's decent looking until she starts packing on the pounds. She's had a couple of nice runs over the years, getting in shape and becoming more popular, but can never keep it together for long and quickly becomes the woman who drinks too much in the bar while wearing clothes that fit her 20 pounds ago. Also, her personality sucks.
If the Tigers were a broad, they would be Kirstie Alley.
The Kansas City Royals
The Royals are the girl that disappeared 20 years when her parents moved the family out of state. She's been gone so long that people forget she ever existed, and even when she tries to get back in touch with the old gang, no pays attention - or cares. Besides, everyone thinks she's weird.
If the Royals were a broad, they would be Linda Blair.
The Cleveland Indians
The Indians are the chick that a lot of guys you know think is hot - but you don't see it. She is the ring leader of her group of friends and that group is large and fiercely loyal to her. You could care less about here and can't figure out what all the fuss is about.
If the Indians were a broad, they would be Sarah Jessica Parker.