Monday, December 8, 2008

The Final Four

If you haven't gotten up to date on the latest Syracuse coaching search news, then good god....get off of this crappy blog and check out what Dave Rahme, Donnie, and the Axeman have to say. While you're at it, the guys at the SportHump have updated Greg Robinson's facebook status.

From what I've read the experts have, narrowed the final four field down to Skip Holtz, Turner Gill, Doug Marrone and Al "Back From the Dead" Golden.

The clock is ticking on Daryl, and being the Idiot that I am...most metaphors I can come up with involve one of my favorite pastimes....hanging at a bar with my friends. In my days of being young and single, I spent a helluva lot of time in doing just that with my fellow Idiots Boss and the Russianator.

The House The Idiots Built

A night out with the boys is always a good time, but we all know the scene....the clock is clicking towards 2:00AM, your wallet is empty, your liver is working overtime and you are scouting the bar for the late-night hookup. Doctor Gross it appears your choices are:

Al Golden- Al is the really young looking chick at the bar. She definitely has some sex appeal, however at the beginning of the night she completely blows you off in front of all of her friends. Later, after a couple hours of downing Bud Light Limes, Apple Pucker shots, and grinding on the dance floor, she can't take her eyes off of you. Part of you is really intrigued. Part of you really wants to hook up with her out of spite, just to show her stuck up friends. You just might be her flavor-of-the-night. The problem being....what bigger and better flavor will be out there the next time she's out with her friends?

Turner Gill- Turner is the chick that comes into the bar and heads turn. She's a newcomer to your tavern of choice, but quickly every guy in the place is following her every move. Your buddies are encouraging you to step up. You have no idea how this would play out, however you are certainly intrigued by the commotion she's causing. Tonight would certainly be fun, but tomorrow she's checking for text messages from her old boyfriend in Nebraska.

Skip Holtz- While you've consistently worked hotter girls (Chip Kelly, Lane Kiffin), deep down you've always had a thing for Skip. Week in and week out she's at your bar and you're pretty sure she's got a thing for you. Early on in the night you had some good rap with her...but the funny thing is, later you are getting nothing but mixed signals from her. As last call approaches you run into each other and she starts to get really touchy-feely with you. You like your chances here. One thing is bothering you....all she talks about all night is how her dream is to one day get a job in South Bend, Indiana.

Doug Marrone- Here is the "down-to-earth/plain Jane/girl next door" that catches your eye. She's nothing flashy, but you've noticed her having a great time with her friends, drinking beers and shying away from the girly-drinks. You are thinking in the back of your mind, she seems too nice for a one-night hookup. You might have to put some time in on this one. You get a chance to talk to her and she's is buying everything you are selling. She really likes you, and although you dig her, there are some hotter chicks out there that you can't keep your eyes off of.

The clock is ticking Daryl. The slow dance songs are playing and soon the house lights will be on.

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