Fat Guy Friday

Photos: Dale G. Young, Detroit News

With the Russianator on vacation, I'm taking care of his baby- Fat Guy Friday. This week we feature front man of the Silver Bullet Band Bob Seger. Bob spent this week placing third at the Buick Pro-Am with some guy named Tiger.

Money Bob, money:

John Daly and Bob Seger, hide the chicken tenders:



Which leads us to:

 Which commercial more likely makes you want to stab yourself in the eye with a fork?

• 
  
  Seger's "Like a Rock"


• 
  
  Mellencamp's "This Is Our Country"

view results
Free vote poll

#3: Syracuse- 28 Virginia Tech-26

Photos: Frank Ordonez, Post-Standard

The end is in sight. We're up to the #3 spot on the Biggesgt Syracuse Football Wins of the HumpIdiot Era. For the 3rd time, a game from 1998 lands on the countdown. This time it's Donovan McNabb's last second heroics vs. Virginia Tech that earns the honors.

Boss, "McNabb buzzer beater heroics and another swarming of the field by the idiots. Pre-last play discussion storming the field, seconds later we're in a pile in the end zone...a bit scary but a blast none the less. And tack on stunned VT fans...I can't top it."

AJV, "The most exciting SU game I've ever witnessed."

Russianator, "I watched this game on TV, we were throwing some dopey party in Albany, but McNabb to Brominski was certainly exciting."

President Bill Taft, The Sporthump, "Poncho and I had the opportunity to be at this game together (in a non-gay way) and had a whole lot of draft beers, dogs and easily influenced 19-year old lady friends to prove it. I do not know much about the ITT of the South, Virginia Tech, but I now they will remember the name Brominski."

Champ, " The throwback-to-the-tight-end play, how many times did that work in the '90s? Overlooked is the ballsy 4th down QB draw play called by Kevin Rogers. The Idiots are all class....after swarming the field Boss and I ran over to the Virginia Tech corner of fans and proceeded to offer up a Mile High Salute to the stunned Hokie fans. We appreciated their shower of trash upon us."

Relive the magic Orange fans, here's the long version (9 minutes):

For those of you only wanting to invest a minute:

Hee...hee...hee...chuckle....chuckle.

#4: Syracuse-66 Miami-13, 1998

Photo: Frank Ordonez, Post-Standard

We've cracked the Final 4 on the Top 10 Biggest Syracuse Football Wins of the HumpIdiot Era Countdown. Donovan McNabb's final home game, a complete blowout of the hated Miami Hurricanes checks in at the four-spot.

Champ, "I don't know where to begin with this one. Back in the day night games were a common occurrence on the hill, which meant one thing for the idiots....a full day of tailgating. A couple of 'Canes players were warming up right in front of us. Boss and Champ quickly got in to a jawing match with these guys and didn't let up until the Cuse layed 66 on them. I had chills when Coach P took Donovan out for his curtain call. But then again that might have been the full day of tailgating."

President Bill Taft, The Sporthump, "Don't get me wrong. I don't hate homeless people (Nothing to do with this grandees' victory, just wanted to make a blanket statement). Next to the right of liberty, the right of property is the most important individual right guaranteed by the Constitution and the one which, united with that of personal liberty, has contributed more to the growth of civilization than any other institution established by the human race. And that is, being in the stands watching the Orange embarass South Beach while two clueless coeds fetch me Light Beers and serve me Dome Dogs. Go Orange!"

AJV, "Felt like payback for finishing second to them for what seemed like every year in the '90s."

Boss, "Definetely the greatest ass-kicking that SU ever laid down on a legitimate team. I have never heard the Dome louder than this, McNabb's final home game. Idiots were in on the postgame storming of the field."

Russianator, "McNabb receives a 5 minute standing ovation on Senior Day. I've never heard the Dome that loud for an introduction in my life. In fact it hasn't been that loud in 10 years. Don follows it up b y leading the Orange to 45 first half pointsin a route of epic proportions. He rand the option that day like he invented it, and the mighty Hurricanes, who had administered numerous beatdowns of the Orange over the years looked foolish. Making it even better, sitting next to me in the Dome that day was my step brother who went to Miami. What a glorious day."

The Complete List:

5. Nebraska, 1984

6. Colorado, 1993 Fiesta Bowl

7. Florida, 1991

8. BC, 2004

9. Michigan, 1998

10. Clemson, 1996 Gator Bowl

Ebay Item of the Week: Walk a Mile in These Shoes

You don't know what it's like to be Jonny. But with this week's Ebay Item of the Week you can walk a mile or two in his shoes. It's gotta be the shoes Jonny:

#5: Syracuse- 17 Nebraska-9, 1984

Checking in at the #5 spot on our silly countdown is the Orange's shocking upset of #1 ranked Nebraska way back in 1984. Sports Illustrated's college football recap from that week can be found here. Let's go to the HumpIdiots:

Poncho, The Sporthump, "Any win against '80s powerhouse Nebraska and their wishbone offense, which was led by Tom Osborne, is worthy of a top ten ranking. I was only 10 at the time, but remember it as well as Hulk's big win over the Iron Sheik at MSG the year before...OTTO IS A REAL AMERICAN, FIGHTS FOR THE RIGHTS OF ORANGEMEN!"

Russianator, "Over the last 30 years, there is no bigger win. SU coming of a 63-7 ass kicking at the hands of the Cornhuskers the year before, shocks #1 Nebraska 17-9. Todd Norley to Mike Siano will live in infamy, as does the claim that frient to T3I Danny Mac touched Norley's cleat when the fans stormed the field after the game. Oklahoma is the only other team that beat Nebraska that year."

Boss, "I have no real comments on this. I don't even remember if it was on TV live...still a tad young then. But when you take down the #1 team a year after getting annihilated by them, it has to make the list."

Champ, "I remember listening to that '83 thrashing on the radio. Doug Logan and 570 WSYR, good times. I also remember turning it off and seeing the final score on CBS later that day....63-7...ouch. Little did I know it would prepare me well for life in the Greg Robinson Era. As for this game, I'm with Boss. Was this even shown on live TV? Anyone? I do remember watching the tape delay the next day on WCNY 24."

The Complete List

6. Colorado, 1993 Fiesta Bowl
7. Florida, 1991
8. BC, 2004
9. Michigan, 1998
10. Clemson, 2996 Gator Bowl

#6: Syracuse- 26 Colorado-22, 1993 Fiesta Bowl

We just keep moving along on our countdown. The Cuse's 1993 Fiesta Bowl victory has earned the #6 spot on the Top 10 Biggest Syracuse Wins of the HumpIdiot Era.

President Bill Taft, The Sporthump "Facing a 3rd and 10 on Colorado's 28 yard line, Marvin Graves took it himself, and ran 28 yards for a touchdown increasing Syracuse's lead to 19-10 with 1:33 in the quarter. Colorado running back James Hill burst for 61 yards a few plays later, to set up a 16 yard slant pass from Stewart to Charles Johnson. The all-important extra point was missed, and Syracuse held on to a 19-16 lead. I then returned to making love to my wonderful Thai girlfriend Mualinda and followed that by drinking a Molson XXX."

Russianator, "What I remember most about this game was that horrendous turf. Beating Colorado meant SU had won 10 games in each of Coach P's first two years. It was a level of success the program could not sustain."

Boss, "How did SU beat that Buffaloes team which was loaded? Why can I not forget the ridiculous IBM OS/2 logo plastered all over the shoddy Sun Devil Stadium field?"

AJV, "After the dream of an outside shot at the National Title died with Chris Gedney being tackled at the three yard line against Miami, Marvin Graves tearing through Colorado's defense made New Year's Day so sweet."

Champ, "I have this one in my DVR collect
ion. Syracuse was 1-0 that year playing on sand."

The Complete List:

7. Florida, 1991
8. BC, 2004
9. Michigan, 1998
10. Clemson, 1996 Gator Bowl

#7: Syracuse-38 Florida-21, 1991

Syracuse's 1991 homecoming victory over Steve Spurrier's Florida Gators holds down the #7 spot on our countdown of the Top 10 Biggest Syracuse Football wins of the HumpIdiot Era.

Russianator, "Steve Spurrier brought a confident Gator team into the Dome. They were 2-0 on the season, they had just thrashed Alabama 35-0 the week before and they were coming off a 9-2 campaign the year before. That all changed when SU ran a reverse on the opening kickoff that Kirby Dar Dar took to the house. The building exploded, SU jumped out to an early lead they would never relinquish. Shane Matthews could not rally the Gators as first year Coach P taught the old ball coach a lesson that day."

AJV, "This is my first 'big' game memory. I remember talking my mom into letting me skip church so I could watch the game. And I was an altar boy."

Boss, "Yes, you read that correctly. It's been 18 years since Kirby Dar Dar took the opening kickoff back against the SEC champions. The Gators only lost one regular season game that fall."

Champ, "The Gators would never come North again."

The Complete List:

8. BC, 2004

9. Michigan, 1998

10. Clemson, 1996 Gator Bowl

#8: Syracuse-43 BC- 17, 2004

Kneel before your god, Superfans!

Photo: AP

The Orange's 2004 victory over Bettor's College lands at the #8 spot on our countdown. All three idiots were in attendance for this one. Breaking news...Diamond Ferri just scored again.

President Bill Taft, The Sporthump: "Two things I love in this world. Diamonds for my lady friends and crossing European Channels in ferries. Put them together and you have the crown jewel of the 2004 Syracuse football season, Diamond Ferri. Ferri ran for 141 yards and 2 touchdowns on 27 carries. He also returned an interception 44 yards for a touchdown, played on special teams and invented 3G technology for the IPhone. Thanks for making all our lives easier Diamond!"

AJV, "The ulitmate eff you to those mother effing, back stabbing, Benedict Arnold traitors! If BC were taken over by a group of terrorists, I'd root for the terrorists."

Boss, "Diamond Ferri starred on the field, while the idiots starred in the Alumni Stadium stands. BC's Superfans had long abandoned ship, leave the house all Orange."

Champ, "A-C-C. A-C-C. A-C-C. Don't let the door hit you on the way out."

The Complete List:

9. Michigan, 1998

10. Clemson, 1996 Gator Bowl

#9: Syracuse-38 Michigan-28, 1998

Photos: Frank Ordonez, Post-Standard

Checking in at the #9 position of the Top 10 Biggest Syracuse Football Wins of the HumpIdiot Countdown, is the Orange's 38-28 victory over Michigan in the Big House. Donnie Webb has a nice look back here. The win came a week after one of the most hearbreaking losses I witnessed in the Dome as Tennessee used a phantom pass interference call to begin their march towards a national title. Here's what your HumpIdiots remember:

Russianator, " Coming off a heartbreaking loss to Tennessee the week before (it wasn't pass intereference) McNabb led the Orange into Ann Arbor and totally owned Tom Brady and the Wolverines. The 38-28 score reflects a slew of garbage points the Wolverines tacked on the board. I've never seen the Orange look so dominant. For the record Michigan finished 10-3 that year."

AJV, "Big House. Brady. Win."

Boss, "At Ann Arbor, 110,000 were never so quiet as Cuse dominated from the start. McNabb was incredible in this one and Orangemen fans needed it after the Tennessee loss the week before."

Champ, "After that Tennessee game I was expecting the all too familiar lay-an-egg-in-front-of-a-national-TV-audience performance that would be common under P. Damn was I wrong. A lot of talent on that field that day. Did this start Lloyd Carr's fascination with Syracuse?"

The Complete List:

10. Syracuse-41 Clemson-0, 1996 Gator Bowl

An Open Letter to Brandon Triche

Dear Brandon:

We read with great interest the excellent article Donna Ditota wrote in the Syracuse Post Standard about what motivates you as a basketball player. We eagerly wait your arrival and can't wait too see you in a Syracuse uniform this winter, doing great things for our beloved Orange.

In the story, Ms. Ditota mentioned you read every blog and internet message board that mentions you and you use any negative comments as motivation. Since this blog is all about honesty we feel there are a few things you need to know before your first semester starts.

Brandon, you are simply not good enough to be play in the Big East. You couldn't even make the main Jordan All-Star game, having been relegated to the regional game, where you won MVP. Let's be honest, DePaul recruits could win the MVP in that game, so don't let that go to your head.

Your jump shot is insufficient and you're a step too slow. You'll never get to the rim in the Big East. You'll never make the all-rookie team, you'll never perform well under the bright lights of Madison Square Garden, and you'll never be able to lead a team many have discounted to a deep run in the NCAA tournament.

You'll never be able to find Andy Rautins coming off screens or throw a decent alley oop to Wes Johnson. You won't be able to catch a Rick Jackson outlet pass, execute the pick and roll with Arinze or make a game winning shot.

You'll never be good enough to lead SU to wins over the Hoyas or Huskies, you'll never be able to handle Lousiville's pressure, and the Pitt Panthers will eat you for lunch.

Jay Wright will toy with you, Bob Huggins' pressure schemes will rattle you, and Fred Hill and Norm Roberts will throw their color by numbers coloring books at you. When one of those hits you in that surgically repaired knee it's all over.

You'll never make it son. But the bad news doesn't stop there, when the real world hits things aren't getting any better. You'll never find a cure for cancer, help starving kids in Africa, or convince Brett Farve to stop waffling about his career.

The upcoming year is going to be a disaster and it's all because you can't play. In fact, we're pretty sure that on the playground you get picked after the guy that looks like Woody Harrelson in White Men Can't Jump. You're such a bad athlete you can't even jump over Wesley Snipes unpaid taxes.

So Brandon, please don't take this the wrong way, we're in your corner, we know you'll never be good enough to make John Thompson III cry - but we'll be watching anyway.

Motivationally Yours,

The Three Idiots

Programming note: I will away on vacation all week and I leave you in the hands of Champ. I'll be back next weekend, when things will start heating up around here. With training camps starting and Big East media day around the corner, look for more activity on this silly little blog, I'll be ready to rock and rant.

#10: Syracuse-41 Clemson-0, 1996 Gator Bowl

Let's light this candle.

Checking in at the #10 position of the Biggest Syracuse Football Wins of the HumpIdiot Era countdown with 12 points is Donovan McNabb's Gator Bowl MVP performance. The Orange's 41-0 win over Clemson featured a 2 TD, 173 performance from Marvin Harrison. Donovan's 300 yard passing perforamnce earned him the MVP.

AJV, "The day I became convinced McNabb would lead us to a National Title, then I remembered I was from Upstate NY."

Boss, "McNabb threw a party that day at the expense of the Tigers defense, 4TD's and game MVP, not bad for a freshmen."

Others receiving votes:

1997 East Carolina- The Poncho Bowl (6)

Poncho, "As an East Carolina Alumn, I still bleed Orange. Although this was not a major win for a club featuring McNabb and a cast of barn burners, it was revenge for a loss a couple years earlier that silenced the Dome. I happened to be there with some college friends from Greenville and got kicked out of a fraternity party because I pee'd on his Chevy Corsica. Smile."

2001 Auburn (5)

Champ, "The first game in the Dome after 9/11. Interestingly enough, the last time I sat in the Russianator's section for a game after dumping a tray of Dome foam all over his neighbors. "

Russianator, "The first game in the Dome post September 11th, the energy in there was special that day. The Orange rode the emotions of the crowd and handled the Tigers 31-14. Afterward we drank with some Auburn fans in Armory Square-- hats off to that fan base, they are a good group."

1992 Ohio State- Hall of Fame Bowl (4)

Poncho, "After running through the Big East like Kobayashi eats hot dogs, the Orange rattled the 'bottom heavy' Big 10 thugs Ohio State to wrap up their 10-2 season. I have always been against of the pretentions use of 'the' preceeding 'Ohio State.' An interesting tidbit: Art Schlichter's career as a compulsive gambler and began and was nurtured at Ohio State. Two words: Maurice Clarett."

AJV, "We used to beat Ohio State. No, really we did."

Champ "The early '90s featured wins over the likes of Ohio State and Texas. Now I'd kill for a win over UConn."

1997 Wisconsin- Kicoff Classic (4)

AJV, "It was my first trip to NYC and I stayed in the hotel while my family walked to Times Square. Probably the best sports weekend of my life, the next day I made my inaugural visit to The Stadium for Donnie Baseball Day."

1998 Rutgers (3)

President Bill Taft, "Don't sit up nights thinking about making me President for that will never come and I have no ambitioin in that direction. I only involve myself with the denigration of the Scarlett Knight football program. Why would a win over Rutgers make my HumpIdiot Top 10? I threw up in a Tully's bathroom and got in a fight with a Syracuse band member. That's why."

1995 North Carolina (1)

1990 Arizona- Aloha Bowl (1)

The HumpIdiot Era is Back

August is slowly creeping up on us. For those of us drinking the Doug Marrone Kool-Aid, that means summer camp will be here before we know it. To get us fired up for the rebirth of Syracuse football, we've called upon our good friends at The Sporthump to help us countdown the "Biggest Syracuse Football Victories of the HumpIdiot Era." For those of you new to us, who are we kidding...we don't get new readers, we trace our love of SU football back to the early/mid '80's (The HumpIdiot Era). We've tried this nonsense before. Check out some of our other hump-idiotic countdowns:

Top 20 Basketball Orangemen

Top 20 Football Orangemen

and the immortal....

Top 20 Old School Nascar Paint Jobs

We've left "Biggest" open for interpretation with your distinguished panelists. Without further ado, besides yours truly, let me introduce you to your HumpIdiots:

Boss: The 3rd member of "The Three Idiots." We don't hear much from him anymore. In fact, the Russianator and I are regularly checking milk cartons and obituaries...just to keep tabs on the guy.

The Sporthump: Take one dancing superstar, Poncho....tack on an early 20th century American President, Bill Taft....and you've got gold my friends. Pure gold. We've had the opportunity to share a halftime suds with Poncho and we look forward to meeting up with Big Bill come this fall.

AJV: Frequent poster on T3I, big-time Cuse fan, and Champ brother-in-law. Yes, nepotism exists even with idiots....deal with it people.

The Russianator: The legend who began T3I. Send your complaints his way. Together, we've seen a ton of football in the Dome while polishing off more than one Dome foam in our day.

Cue up the Casey Kasem, we're counting them down this week, HumpIdiot style.

Fat Guy Friday

Welcome to Fat Guy Friday, where we celebrate athletes who celebrate the buffet. With NFL training camps set to open, this week's fat guy is former defensive linemen turned sideline reporter and man cave builder Tony Siragusa.

You want to know how serious the Goose is about being fat? He's doing PSAs for honey, that's how serious.



And what goes great with obesity? Why smoking of course. There's nothing like polishing off a whole ham, washing it down with a boat of gravy and then retiring to a lounge to enjoy some fine tobacco. Tony can help make that happen.



Personally I do enjoy Tony's work as a sideline reporter - here he is interviewing everyone's favorite quarterback.



Unfortunately I could not find any videos of Tony actually playing football, but the man had a solid career compiling over 500 tackles and 22 sacks as a run-stuffing defensive lineman. He also won a Super Bowl, something Dan Marino and his nutri-system loving body never did. You'd never see Tony appear in a commercial with Larry the Cable Guy.



Congrats Tony, you are a real fat man of genius.

Ebay Item of the Week: He's back!

Remember this thing? Well our loyal readers (both of you out there) will recall last month when we contemplated if this was the resulting love child from Otto's one night stand with a Care Bear.

Well Cuse fans, this thing is back. My tailgating buddy Joe makes a fine cocktail we like to refer to as "The Pain Killer." Trust me, it got us through the GRob era. If only I had my Otto Love Child Wind Up Cup to drink out of.

Long Live the USFL

Ron Mexico is now free and there is speculation if he isn't reinstated this year to play in the NFL, he could end up in the UFL. The UFL is the United Football League, and yes, it exists people. This new pro football league is populated by coaching superstars like Jim Fassell, Ted Cottrell, Jim Haslet, and Dennis Green. That last sentence is 100 percent true - so crown my ass.

Regardless of how long the UFL holds on, whether it's one year or one week, in my heart and in my mind it will never hold a candle to the league where Doug Flutie, Reggie White and Herschel Walker once reigned supreme - the USFL.

Let's all take a second and remember that fine, fine brand of spring football



And any league that can get Lee Corso to run like this should have a special place in everyone's heart - not so fast indeed:

Get Your Popcorn Ready

In case you hadn't heard, Terrell Owens has a new "reality" show that debuts tonight on VH1. An early review reveals that it's basically TO is being TO. My condolences go out to Bills fans -- you get to deal with this hot mess all fall.

Jammin Jonny

Courtesy of the Big Lead, here's a video of Jonny Flynn doing a windmill jam in the NBA Summer League. Jonny was named the top rookie performer in the Las Vegas league, although his team lost four or five. Welcome to Minnesota Jonny.

Fat Guy Friday - British Open Edition

I'm a little jammed up at work today, so we'll keep the prose to a minimum. This week's Fat Guy Friday features John Daly, who shot a 68 in the first round yesterday, while wearing this outfit.



Photo: By Adrian Dennis, AFP/Getty Images

Here are a couple of classic videos of Daly in action:

Daly hitting a ball off a beer can




Shirtless John




Highlights of when he won the 1995 British




Crushing one off the tee

Ebay Item of the Week: "You're with me, pleather."

I was getting worried. My David Puddy inspired 8-Ball jacket has been getting a lot of wear. This week's Ebay Item of the Week comes just in time.

Do I love this week's find?

"All signs point to yes!"

Random Rants and Ramblings

What is going on people? Wait, don't answer that, in the world of sports we already know the answer -- not much. So as I sit here, watching the AL win another yet another All-Star game and trying to get the image of Poncho dancing out of my head, let's rant, ramble and create a post with no coherent theme.

- It's not a topic worth debating, but having the winner of the All-Star game get home field advantage for the playoffs is flat-out retarded. If you play games, keep score and record standings, the obvious answer should be the team with the better record gets home field advantage. If you are a fan of a good NL team did you really want to rely on a Met to help you try and break the AL's winning streak? I didn't think so.

- Orange Chuck, Sean and I got into a nice Twitter discussion last night over the absurdity of SU retiring the number 44. The question wasn't resolved, so let me toss this out - is retiring 44 worse than:

• Nazis
• Being forced to watch a talk show featuring Mike Lupica, Skip Bayless and Jay Marriotti
• Georgetown winning the national championship (in anything)
• All of the above

- Feel free to discuss that below, I am too lazy to actually create a poll.

- As someone that initially hated it, I really enjoy Twitter far too much. Now that I'm in my mid 30s, I'm wondering at what point I'll refuse to adopt any new technology and become an old stubborn idiot. Will I still be clinging to Twitter in 30 years like the NYPD is to typewriters? The answer - maybe.

- Prince Fielder won the home run derby and he's a vegetarian. He's also really fat. What people sometime fail to realize, donuts are vegetarian - well except these.

- Did you know Gary Bettman made $7 million last year? That's the equivalent of giving Governor Paterson a couple million a year. If those guys flipped jobs I don't think anyone would notice.

- The MLB All-Star game was shorter than the HR derby - you're not far behind Bud Selig.

- NFL training camps open in 10 days for some teams. This makes me extremely happy and violently pissed off at the same time, given the fact that its the middle of July and the summer in upstate NY has been worse than Michael Strahan's new sitcom is bound to be. I've turned my central air on three times all year. Thanks for nothing summer - go F yourself.

- It will be interesting to see who has a better rookie season in Syracuse, Doug Marrone or Brandon Triche. I have high hopes for both.

- In order to make sure players are rested and to prepare for a brutal out of conference schedule, Rutgers has built a "recruiting lounge" - it will undoubtedly be filled with Aquanet, Bon Jovi cassettes, and the keys to a used 1987 Camaro IROC.

- There are no sports on Wednesday, but the photo above is courtesy of manofest, enjoy the site.

Syracuse NBA Summer League Update

I went to the eye doctor's last night for a routine eye examine and the bastard doctor dialated my eyes as part of the examine. As a result, there was no blogging last night, the computer screen was so blurry you'd have thought I was partying with Artie Lange last night.

Anyway, here's a quick update of NBA Summer League happenings featuring former Orangeman:

- Chuck has a wrap up of stats here.

- About three quarters of the way down this article there is a mention of Jonny Flynn, saying he gets whatever he wants.

- Jonny gives himself a C in this Niagara Gazette article.

- Here is the official recap from the T-wolves game NBA.

- And for everything you want to know about the T-wolves, you should check Canis Hoopis often. They are a dedicated bunch over there.

Syracuse NBA Summer League Update

Jonny Flynn and Paul Harris made their NBA summer league debuts Sunday, playing for the Minnesota Timberwovles in the Las Vegas summer league. The T-wolves fell to the Houston Rocket team 79-65, with Flynn contributing 11 points and Harris adding 5 in an up and down debut.

According to reports Flynn started the game with three turnovers, but did settle down. According to Twitter, teammnate Kevin Love was impressed.

David Thorpe, who live "live tweeting" the games was also impressed with Flynn. The Timberwolves blog Canis Hoopus has a complete and detailed write up on the game as well, noting that Jonny's quickness and ability were balanced out by "sometimes putrid shot selection."

For players like Flynn who are guaranteed to be on the roster, summer league results don't really mean much and we should obviously take the results with a grain of salt, as Donte Greene scored 42 in summer league game last year, however for a marginal player like Harris, these games mean a lot. He's not only auditioning for the Timberwolves, but trying to show the rest of the league he had the ability to play at the highest level.

We will keep an eye on their progress and try to pass along updates - it's either that or write about the MLB All-Star game, and something tells me that's not going to happen.

Curtis Brinkley Update

According to this article in the Philadelphia papers, Curtis Brinkley will be OK. What that holds for his football future is unknown. Get well soon Curtis.

Philly.com - Shooting could delay Brinkley's football career

Fat Guy Friday

Fat professional athletes are wonderful. These are men (and in some cases women, but Fat Chick Friday doesn't sound as catchy) who have reached the pinnacle of their respective sports and done so in various stages of obesity.

The average sports fan would kill to be in their position, earning vast amounts of money to play a kids game, while still being able to eat 10 cheeseburgers a day. Think about it - athletic success without all that pesky working out. It's everyone's dream - or it should be. So with the weekend just about here, let's celebrate another Fat Guy Friday.

Since July is the heart of baseball season, there are plenty of overweight baseball players to choose from - most of which seem to be pitchers. So without further delay, this week's Fat Guy Friday feature is Bob "Sticky" Wickman.

Wickman pitched in the major leagues for a remarkable 16 years, mainly out of the bullpen. He finished his career with the Arizona Diamondbacks, after being unceremoniously waived by the Atlanta Braves earlier in the year. Wickman must have some friends at Baseball-Reference.com because they generously listed his vitals as 6'1" and 212 pounds. There is ample visual evidence to dispute this:

There has to be a couple thousand cases of beer in that gut:



Here are a few quick fun facts about Bob:

- His pants were once for sale on eBay.
- He broke in with the NY Yankees and actually went 14-4 as a starter in his second year in the bigs.
- He is the all-time saves leader in the history of the Cleveland Indians franchise.
- Mariano Riveria once earned a save on a Wickman victory.
- Chuck Norris isn't the only one with facts, Bob has some too.
- You can get all the latest Wickman news at the Wickman's Warriors web site.

And we'll close with a few video clips on the big man in action. When Bob is about to enter a game, you should be ready for a good time - as the theme music tells us:



And here is Wick signing some autographs:

Breaking: Curtis Brinkley Shot

Some sad news emerging from Philadelphia this morning, former SU running back and current San Diego Charger Curtis Brinkley was shot last night. The good news is that there are reports that the injuries are not life threatening. We wish Curtis and the Brinkley family well during this tough time.

Here are a few news links as details on the story are still emerging:

- Syracuse.com - Former Syracuse University running back Curtis Brinkley is shot.

- Philly.com - NFL Player Shot in Montco.

- The ABC TV affiliate in Philly says the injuries are not life threatening - Former Phila h.s. football star shot.

For more information, watch the usual news sources like Syracuse.com. I'm sure Sean will be all over this today at nunesmagician as well.

In additon, the Axeman and Matt McClusky are both posting links and updates on their Twitter pages. Give them a follow:

Axe on Twitter - @AxemanBlog

Matt McClusky - @McsSportsFix

Ebay Item of the Week: Those are some big pants to fill

Are you man enough to fill the pants of Orange center Arinze Onuaku? This week's Ebay Item of the Week gives you that opportunity.

Welcome Back Manny, Now Sit Down

The three plus games Manny Ramirez has played since returning from his suspension must have taken a toll on the poor little juicer, because after going 2-4 against the team formerly known as the Mets Tuesday night, he managed to get himself ejected.

Courtesy of Fan Dome, here is the video of Manny getting himself tossed. The snazzy music is free of charge.

Times are Tough for Nationals Fans

In news that will surprise no one, the Washington Nationals suck. We're not talking about struggling, we're talking about flat-out suckitude. They have the worst record in the majors with nine less wins than the second worst team, the Cleveland Indians.

They are so bad they are actually one of the top drawing road teams in the majors - because fans of the opposing team are almost guaranteed to see a victory if the Nationals are in town. As you can imagine, things are a bit rougher at home, where on an average only about 23,000 hearty souls show up to watch the home team roll over and play dead.

Of course, that's a minor miracle considering this may be their actual theme song (I'm not 100 percent sure it is their theme song, but it's bad enough to believe that it is).



Things are so bad that a Nats fan was actually poked fun at on one of my favorite web sites - Don't Even Reply. The site consists of one man replying to want ads posted on-line and pranking the people who placed the ads. Hilarity ensues. It is seriously one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Fair warning to the faint of heart and those at work - the site contains a ton of foul language, so if that's something that could cause a problem, you've been warned.

A couple of weeks ago a Nationals Fan posted an add looking for tickets to their game against the Red Sox, and let's just say things didn't go well. Check it out for yourself.

The good news for Nationals fans, Greg Robinson isn't your coach and the All-Star break is just around the corner - you can't lose if you don't play.

Politicians to Save College Football Post Season

The college football post-season is hopelessly broken. Big money special interests that run the bowl games and the conferences that are making millions off the BCS have prevented any kind of a playoff system from being put in place. All we fans get are flimsy, absurd excuses about how bad a playoff system would be. Supposedly it would cause student athletes to miss tests, it would be too taxing physically and blah, blah, blah.

None of these excuses apparently apply to student athletes in all the other subdivisions that actually participate in a playoff system and they certainly didn't matter a few years ago when the college football season was expanded to 12 games.

This thing has been so screwed up for so long, I haven't spent more than 2 minutes thinking about it in years. Much like the fact that you can only get the NFL Sunday ticket if you have a satellite dish, it's something that doesn't make sense for most fans, but it's likely not going to change. I'd rather concentrate my efforts on posting videos of fat athletes on Friday, that at least feels productive.

However, fear not oppressed college football fans - there's hope on the horizon and it's better than anything you could ever hope for. Our politicians are going to save us. Congress, backed by an 18 percent approval rating, is set to hold more hearings on the BCS system.

I'll be honest, until I saw Tim Stephens Twitter post tonight on Tuesday's Congressional hearings on the BCS, I had no idea these things were going on. If you're on Twitter, give Tim Stephens a follow, there's plenty of good stuff coming from him. Besides it doesn't take long to read 140 character posts - unless you're a defender of the BCS.

Stephens has an informative post up on everything you need to know about the hearings. It's a great read and will get you caught up to speed on the issue. Afterward you'll want to beat your head against a wall.

An Unexpected Trip to Yankee Stadium

So Friday my friend Greg calls and asks if I want to go to Yankee Stadium on the 4th of July because he had two free tickets fall into his lap. I have a rule -- any time I can celebrate America's birthday by watching the quintessential American baseball play a team from Canada while starting a guy from Taiwan and subsequently having a guy from Puerto Rico ultimately win the game, I always go. You can never pass that up.

Allow me to share my experience with you.

The day started just fine, we were rolling down 87 South making small talk in my fuel-efficient Jeep Cherokee when I realized something was horribly wrong. With the game set for a 1:05 start, that would mean one thing - I'd miss the Nathan's hot dog eating contest.

Now I love the hot dog eating contest like David Duchovny loves free porn and I immediately became distraught. A quick phone call to the girlfriend at least ensured she'd DVR the event for me. With my mind at relative ease, our trip continued uneventfully, although I was pretty sure there would be no way I'd be able to avoid learning who won the mustard belt before I could watch it for myself.

Once the vehicle was parked we were off on a mission to buy overpriced souvenirs for Greg's wife and son so he could make up for abandoning them so we could drink beer and watch baseball. Being men, this took 2 minutes, which meant we had time to duck into Stan's to slam a few cold ones before the game started.

Before we continue, I've been in Stan's many times but just went on their web site for the first time and let me just say I'm shocked. The site is about 100 times nicer than the actual bar and due to my line of work, I'm familiar with how much it costs to develop a web site. Let's just say Stan's sunk some money into a web presence. I'm flabbergasted.

This is where the story takes a turn for the good - being a great American bar, Stan's has the hot dog eating contest on. With beer in hand, we settle in to watch Joey Chestnut set records and keep the mustard belt in the USA. Greg got the whole bar involved by starting the U-S-A chant with 2 minutes to go. God bless this country.

After Joey's inspiring victory, we were fired up to check out the new stadium. For anyone that's been, or anyone that's interested in this type of thing, I'm not about to break any new ground here, but the new place is really nice. Like most of the new parks being built these days, you can see the field from most of the concourse areas, which is great when you're paying for $9 Coors Lights and $6 Nathan's hot dogs (actual prices). A fun fact, if Joey Chestnut had to buy every hot dog he ate at the contest at Yankee Stadium, it would have cost him $408.

So, we get to our seats and low and behold, they are really, really good. In fact, you know you have good seats when you see this on the seat in front of you:

The day was beautiful and sunny, and since the game happend nearly 2 days ago now, there's no need for me to recap it for you. However I did take a few other shots for your viewing pleasure. You'll have to excuse the quality of the photos, I once again forgot my camera and had to rely on the camera phone on blackberry curve.

Everyone's favorite - Alex Rodriguez - I really don't like the red hats.

Robinson Cano had another tough day:

Jeter, looking bored. You would be too if the person to your right constantly talks in cliches and leads the league in blank stares.

I'd like to make one point on the Yankees since we don't discuss baseball much on this blog. Wang left the game with shoulder trouble and it looks like Phil Hughes will stay in the bullpen. I understand that Wang has been very good over the prior three years, but the fact of the matter is that this year he hasn't been right. Even when he's marginally effective he's only giving you 5 innings. It's time to get Hughes ready to be a starter again. No one wins a pennant based on how they played the year before.

So the moral of this post is - if someone offers you ridiculously good seats to a great stadium, take them. Especially when the Yankees win it in 12 innings.

Fat Guy Friday

Welcome to the pre-Fourth of July edition of Fat Guy Friday. This week's featured fat athlete is a long time favorite of the T3I - David Boomer Wells. Wells pitched for 10 major league teams over the course of his career and managed to last 20 years in the big leagues, being fat the whole time. Wells legendary shape and longevity are now used as proof that junk food makes you fast.

He is one of one 17 players in Major League history to pitch a perfect game, which he did after partying hard the night before.



Boomer's legendary partying and disdain for exercise has inspired others to use career to develop lifestyle regimes.



Since retiring, Wells has taken up poker, here he is talking about the difference between poker and baseball.



David Wells LA Dodgers Poker Interview - cardplayertube.com
by tweedenleann


In this clip Wells totally rocks the open shirt, gold chain and admits that he didn't read his own book.



Some interesting facts about Wells include:

- He was almost involved in a trade for Mariano Riveria back in 1995.
- He passed on Jose Canseco's offer to get him HGH
- The Babe Ruth cap he supposedly tried to wear during a game in 1997 is for sale

If you can't get enough Wells, tune in to TBS on Sunday, he'll be on the broadcast team that announces the American League All Star selections at noon.

Happy Birthday U.S.A.

Let's celebrate this the only way we know how. With the help of some 1980's pro wrestling superstars:

1. For the "Real Americans" out there:




2. All American "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan has few words for Yokozuna and Mr. Fuji:



3. Former Steelers coach Bill Cowher makes an appearance on Piper's Pit:


4. Lex Lugar makes us proud on the July 4th:



5. Iraqi defector Bill Cowher faces Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania:

Taking Tasteless to a Whole New Level

Have you heard about Arland Bruce? He plays in the Canadian Football League and decided to "honor" Michael Jackson by ripping off his pads and playing dead after scoring a touchdown. True story.

Here is the video, which I found at Sports Rubbish. I wonder what he'll do next week to "honor" the memory of Alexis Arguello.

Fourth of July Chip Advice - Kige Style

Kige Ramsey is back with a YouTube cooking segment where he discusses his top 3 chip selections from summer barbeque. Personally I'm a fan of Cape Cod kettle cooked chips, but hey, that's just me. The best part about the video, Kige apparently shot it in the auto parts section of whatever store his was in - notice the tires above his head. Nothing goes better with a good bag of chips than a side of armor all.

By the way, he's dead on regarding barbeque Fritos, those things are awesome.

Only Poor Guys Hit it Forward

Phil Mickelson was the second highest earner in Sports Illustrated's Fortune 50 list of top earning athletes, raking in nearly $53 million in 2008. While that's an astounding number, I still think being able to hit the ball backwards is even more impressive.



Phil's wife Amy underwent surgery today to determine the scope of her breast cancer we wish her all the best. F*ck you cancer.

Ebay Item of the Week: Dirty or clean? How do you like it Orange fans?

Do you know how much energy is wasted by Americans every day opening the dishwasher to see if the load inside is clean or dirty?

Well, if anything you have to admire our country's way of becoming more and more lazy by the minute. With this week's Ebay Item of the Week you can let everyone if your dishes are Michael Graham Hoya dirty or GMac clean.

A New Syracuse Recruit and One Big Hit

Donnie Webb is reporting that Syracuse received a verbal commitment from running back/defensive back Dom Timbers to play football for the Orange. Naturally that sent me looking for video highlights of young Mr. Timbers. Sadly it appears he is one of the few high school athletes these days without a shaky, homemade highlight reel loaded on the internet.

However, in the course of my search, I did find this video showing a high school football player crushing an opponent - enjoy.



And here are some highlights of a Woodland Hills loss early last season, before Timbers was on the field.