Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Who do we follow now?


Well that stunk. The NCAA's field of 68 dwindled down to a Sweet 16 this weekend sans our beloved Syracuse Orange. If your Monday was anything like mine, it was spent avoiding ESPN and sports talk radio at all costs. But like an old flame that's broken your heart one-too-many times, we find the NCAA Tournament way too hard to resist. Who are we kidding? We've got another weekend in front of us planted on the couch watching hoops, listening to NAPA commercials, and shoving unhealthy snacks down our pie-holes. In other words:


So what team is a Syracuse fan left to pull for? Well first and foremost everyone should be for whatever team will help you in your (for recreational purposes only) office pools. Those allegiances aside, T3I offers up our Bandwagon Guide to help our fellow idiots sift through the remaining sixteen squads left battling for this year's title. Let's break it down:

THE NO WAY IN HOLY H-E-DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS GROUP:

Duke: Seriously, do we need to justify? You never, ever root for Duke.

UNC: See above. I like to compare the Duke-UNC rivalry to the Iran-Iraq War of the 1980s. There's no good guy here. Full disclosure, I have a DEEP anti-ACC bias.

UConn: Spare me the "we need to support the Big East" argument. The worst fans in the Big East make this one a no-brainer. You really want these guys to have another title?

Richmond-: Do you even have to ask?

THE ONLY IF YOU PUT A GUN TO MY HEAD GROUP:

Florida State- Another ACC villain. These guys escape the "No Way" grouping only because of the bone Bobby Bowden threw us in 2004 by helping us round out our football schedule in the wake of the ACC's raid on the Big East.

Ohio State: A really good team in a really bad conference.

Kentucky: Calipari = smug. Also, see 1996. Moving on.

Wisconsin: Bo Ryan really plays an exciting brand of basketball. And by exciting I mean "makes me want to stab my eyes out with a dull pencil."

Florida: I'm still having nightmares over that Gators squad that won back-to-back titles. Personally, I miss the Billy Donovan Orlando Magic era.

THE LUKEWARM GROUP:

Marquette: All pain aside, I can't really justify hating this team. Plus, we have a potential reality superstar in the making with Buzz Williams.

Butler: Maybe we should rename this group the "Hey They Beat Syracuse Group." Bonus points for their part in an unbelievable ending versus Pitt.

Kansas: We got them in '03 and this might be the best team to derail Ohio State.

Arizona: Besides a 1987 loss in the Great Alaska Shootout to the Wildcats, I don't hold much animosity towards this team.

THE I COULD LIVE WITH THIS TEAM WINNING IT GROUP:

BYU: All aboard the Jimmer Express.

San Diego State: When did Steve Fisher turn 90 by the way? Boy that guy has aged.

THE ALL ABOARD GROUP:

VCU: The Colonial League is a guilty pleasure of the Idiots. Between George Mason's Final Four run and the Russianator's fake alma matter, Old Dominion, we follow this league a little closer than other mid-majors. However, let's focus on what this team has going for it.

Underdog- check.

Beat Duke in 2007- check.
Good enough for us:

2 comments:

Cuse Country said...

Wait, the tournament is still going on? I didn't realize this.

Poncho Sinatra said...

I couldn't agree more with this analysis - bravo! A little frustrated by the BYU loss last night, blah.